This week I got to go to a school – the kind for liddle humans, which I’ve done a couple times, an it’s always WAY fun. It totally was this time, too. The school is called Rosewood MAG-nut, an the innerview-ee was Miss Eloise Mabel Lomascolo.
We met at the school because Miss Eloise’s Mom is Assis-tunt PRINCE-upple. (I think that means her boss is a PRINCE, but I’m not sure.)
It was Very Early in the morning, when the stoo-dents were just arrivin’. Me an my assistant were shown to a room with a big table, where we were greeted by a frenly lady an man, an two beautiful re-TREE-vers, one all white (I found out it’s called English Cream) wearin a pink collar; an the other, who was Gold, wearin’ a blue collar. He looked fuh-MILL-yer, then I remembered, I’d met him a coupla years back. “Oh, Woof! You’re HER-schel, right? It’s BEEN a minute!”
“Good to see ya, Bonz,” he replied. “You’re lookin’ good. An THIS is my liddle sis, Eloise. She’s just a year old.”
“It’s a great pleasure to meet you, Miss Eloise,” I told her.
“Hi, Mr. Bonzo!” she said, wagging with enthusiasm. “Herschel says your gonna do a story about me an I get my PICK-shur in the PAYper. I’m SO excited! Oh, an I’m s’pose to innerduce our Mommy an Daddy. Um, so, Mommy’s Jennifer an Daddy’s Jeff. Mommy works here an Daddy’s helpin’ cuz there’s me AN Herschel. Me an him are together ALL the time, pretty much. He’s the BEST!! “
We all got SIT-chew-waited and Herschel an Eloise stood side-by-side in front of their Daddy, starin’ right at him an not movin’ a muscle. He made a liddle motion with his hand (which had a treat in it) an said “Sit” real soft, whereupon they both plopped right into a sit. Treats ensued. I was impressed.
“So, Miss Eloise,” I said, opening my notebook, “how did you find your Furever Famly?”
“Herschel’s gonna help me if I don’t remember, OK?”
“Absolutely,” I told her.
“I’m right here, little sis,” Herschel assured her.
“’Kay, so, buh-for me, Herschel hadda big sister, a re-TREE-ver like him, Ellie Mae. But, then, in Joo-LIE, she hadda go to Dog Heaven an Mommy an Daddy an Herschel were Really Sad.”
Herschel puh-litely inner-jected: “We totally were. Ellie Mae was my Big Sister AN Best Fren, an I missed her SO MUCH! I just gloomed around. At first Mommy an Daddy thought they’d wait for Quite-A-While buh-for gettin’ another pooch. But after about 3 months, it was TIME. So they called my same breeder an …”
“An,” Miss Eloise cut in, “the breeder called Mommy and Daddy when they had the next litter, which was MY litter. When we were 11 weeks old, Mommy an Daddy drove all the way to the breeder – 3 whole hours. Well, my siblings were bein’ all bouncy, an I was just sittin’ back an sorta, you know, ob-ZER-vin’. An, even though I was just a floofy ball of fluff, soon as I saw ’em, I was like, THAT’S MY FUREVER MOMMY AN DADDY!”
I nodded. “Dogs KNOW.”
“What I think, Bonz,” Herschel said solemnly, “I think Ellie Mae sent Eloise to us. I totally do.
Mommy thinks so, too.”
I nodded again.
“An, Mr. Bonzo,” Miss Eloise continued, “I was a little woofed out on the ride to my new home. It was a long, dark drive and I wasn’t feelin’ that good. But guess what?”
“What?”
“See, Mommy an Daddy had brought a towel they had wiped all over Herschel, an they wrapped me in it on the way home so I’d be fuh-MILL-yer with his smell when I first met him.”
“Woof!” I exclaimed. “That is SO Cool Kibbles!”
“I KNOW! Right?” she agreed. “We’re pretty much always together. An you know what else?
Mommy an Daddy gave me my name in honor of Ellie Mae: Eloise for Ellie an Mabel for Mae. Pawsome, doncha think?”
“Totally!” I agree (wiping my eyes with my paw). “So, Miss Eloise, tell me about your new life. Has Herschel been treating you properly?”
“Hey,” Herschel said, “I’m a Proud Big Brother. I welcomed this liddle fluff muffin to the family right away. SHE’S the one who gets rowdy and nips my ears an elbows an stuff. Then Mommy hasta tell her, ‘ELOISE, CHOOSE KINDNESS!’”
Pretty soon, several bunches of liddle kids an their teachers began poppin’ by to say hello to Herschel an Eloise an give ’em liddle pats on the head. It was Way Cool Kibbles till the bell rang an they all hadda go to their classrooms.
“THAT was fun,” I exclaimed, then, “So, Miss Eloise, Do you have any favrite foodstuffs?”
“Oooo, yes! Crunchy K-rats. An VEG-tubbles: Q-cumbers, CELL-ry, tuh-MAY-does. An STOO: that’s kibbles, water an canned turkey, AN,” (she lowered her voice) “Daddy makes us speshul PAN-cakes with a liddle bit of SY-rup as a treat.”
“I bet you have lotsa pooch pals,” I ventured.
“Oh, woof, yes! Lots: Like Zoe and Lexie. On leash walks I always stop in their driveway to see if they can come out and play. Humans, too: Miss Susanne’s the Best Dog Aunt EVER, an lotsa teachers and Nurse Lynn, Granny an Grandaddy an Gramma an PopPop, an up in Maryland, there’s our human brothers and sisters Corey, Lucie, Colton, Ethan, Corinne an Gabe. We do Road Trips to visit them.”
“I also enjoy TOYS,” she segued. “I grab one an BARK to get Mommy and Daddy’s attention an show ’em my Very Intresting Toy.”
“What she doesn’t tell you,” innerjected Herschel, “is that she is the Destructor of Toys. Mostly MY toys. An MY blanket! An MY nylon bones.”
“Well, I guess that might be troo,” Miss Eloise admitted. “I also like to watch Animal Planet. I usta jump on the screen when I saw an animal, but now I know they’re not ackshully there. Did you know that?”
“I learned it the same way you did,” I admitted.
Heading home, I was thinkin’ about beautiful, enthusiastic, ram-bunk-shus Miss Eloise, an my fren an her devoted Big Brother Herschel, an feelin’ happy they had found each other.
Till next time,
Don’t Be Shy
We are always looking for pets with interesting stories. To set up an interview, email
[email protected].
