Bonz: Happy-go-lucky Ronnie is one pup-ular pooch

PHOTO BY JOSHUA KODIS

This week’s innerview-ee is a sweet, eager, silly liddle Mini Australian Shepherd, still mostly a pupper: Ronnie Mulholland. She bounced right up for the Wag-an-Sniff, and hardly stopped waggin’ an bouncin’ for the doo-RAY-shun.

“HELLO, Mr. Bonzo! Come IN!! I’m Ronnie! This is my Mommy Victoria an THIS is my Gramma Karen who’s gotta zoom off to work Right NOW! An this is our fren RaeAnne. My Papa Joel’s restin’. My hooman brothers Ethan, he’s 5, an Camden, he’s just 2, are elsewhere at the moment. PLUS, over THERE, oh, wait, over by the … oh, wait, under the … oh, THERE … (he pointed to a black-an-white blur that appeared on the couch for 2 seconds then vanished) is my big sister Kiki. She what’s called a CAT, which Mommy says is a different spee-shees than a DOG, but I’m not unnerstandin’ that yet zackly.”

When Ronnie pawsed to take a breath, I said, “Woof! Ronnie! What a great famly you have! I can’t wait to hear your tail!”

The humans sat around a table, me an Ronnie settled in nearby and I opened my notebook.

“Ready when you are,” I told her.

“K. So, my ’memberin’s a liddle fluffy. I haven’t been around that long.”

“You’re doin’ grrreat. No worries.”

“Thank you, Mr. Bonzo. My Mommy had a coupla pooches like me when SHE was just a pupper, so she figgered another Mini Australian Shepherd’d be purrfect for Ethan an Camden.

Anyway, me an my brother an sister were in Clearwater, so Mommy and Ethan an Camden came to see us in the fur. One of my sibs was kinda nippy, an the other was a boy an Mommy wanted a grrrl. Plus, I went right up to Camden an licked his face. I dunno why. It just came to me.”

“Well, there you go,” I smiled. “So, what was it like when you first met Kiki?” I had to ask.
Before Ronnie could reply, a black-an-white cat suddenly appeared out of the blue in front of me like Poof! out of the air, short hair, looong tail, white paws. I tried not to look startled but she KNEW! I knew she knew. And she knew I knew she knew. I have learned that once a cat gets One Up on you, you NEVER get it back.

“Good morning! Miss Kiki, I presume,” I said, mustering the most non-shu-LANT dog-of-the-world pose I could. She didn’t give a woof. She just grinned and licked a paw.

“You’re quick!” she said sweetly. “I can answer your question. I myself had been Mistress of the House for quite some time. Rescued by H.A.L.O. Adopted. Returned for some unknown reason. Then regifted to my Mom from a fren. I was purr-fectly happy. Then last month, THIS liddle ninny-muffin arrives. I mean. SERIOUSLY. I am a Ferocious Lioness. A Huntress. Never had time for mundane wastes of time such as PLAY. I LOUNGE! I WATCH! I STALK. I LURK.

I am a-LOOF. But all THIS goofball wanted to do was play, play, play, an, what’s worse, SNUGGLE. YUCK! I hissed at her to let her know who’s boss.”

Ronnie appeared utterly unphased by Kiki’s comments. Quite the contrary, she ran over an bounced smack on top of her. The pair appeared to be about the same size. They tumbled about on the floor, went zooming down the hall play-bumping each other, then zoomed back.

Ronnie flopped onto the floor an Kiki assumed her former regal position and continued, not missing a beat:

“However, Ronnie was relentless. Ultimately, in spite of myself, I discovered that playing can be, well, FUN. Who knew? Full disclosure, we are now officially Total BFFs: sisters-under-the-fur.”

And with that, she strolled off, tail held high.

“Isn’t she grrreat?” Ronnie said happily. “Anyway, look, I have my very own comfy easy chair, an lotsa toys. I’ve also sorta borrowed Kiki’s toys, too. An, on occasion, Ethan an Camden’s. I mean, toys are toys, right? An, well, there they ARE. But I take pretty good care of um. They all still squeak. I did, umm, well, eat a hole in the wall a while back, which Mommy explained wasn’t a good idea.”

“Where do you sleep?” I skillfully changed the subject.

“Well, Kiki is pretty much Gramma Karen’s cat, so she sleeps with Gramma. Me, I have my own bed in Mommy’s room, an sometimes I jump up on hers for extra snuggles. An SOMEtimes, if the door gets left open, I sleep with Ethan or Camden.”

“I see you have a pool,” I said. “Do you swim?”

“NO! Abso-woofin’-lutely NO! I fell in once and Mommy hadda rescue me. It was traw-MADDIC! Bein’ wet is ICKKY! What I like to do is Hunker! I have cool liddle secret places to Hunker in all over the house.”

“Cool Kibbles! Any fav foodstuffs?” (Note to self: Google hunker.)

“Mostly whatever Camden an Ethan drop on the floor. Except French Fries. Don’t like them. Truthfully, I kinda prefer Kiki’s food.

“Ackshully, Mr. Bonzo,” Ronnie tilted her head and looked right at me, a serious expression in her big brown eyes, “even though I’m still mostly a wiggly pupper, I have a Very Important Job: I’m an Emotional Support Animal for Papa Joel. He’s Very Sick an I’m always ready to be right with him whenever he wants me to, like ridin’ with him on his scooter when we got to the mailbox. Mommy says cuzza me bein’ a shepherd dog, I have IN-stinks to herd an take care of fellow creatures. Helpin’ Papa Joel makes me feel Very Honored, you know?”

“I totally do, Ronnie. I buh-leeve every pooch has a purpose. An you’ve found yours.”

Headin’ home, I was thinkin’ about how Ronnie, although still a wiggly pupper, had already discovered her Very Important Purpose; an smilin’, remembering Ronnie an Kiki tumbling all over the place in a Frenzied Furball of Fun.

Till next time,

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