The family sits together in a restaurant, but no one is talking.
Mom is scrolling through Facebook. Dad is answering work emails. One child is watching YouTube while another is immersed in a video game. They are seated at the same table, yet worlds apart.
It’s a scene that has become increasingly common in restaurants, homes and waiting rooms across America, raising an important question: How much screen time is too much?
The dilemma has even made its way to Hollywood. In the upcoming “Toy Story 5,” the franchise’s star character abandons her loyal toy friends in favor of a child’s tablet. The storyline mirrors a struggle many parents know all too well and opens the door to conversations about both the benefits and the drawbacks of growing up in a digital world.
“We can’t pretend screens don’t exist, so we need to find ways to expose our children to technology without inhibiting their development or their ability to learn in real life,” said Dr. Lindsay Lewis, a pediatrician with HCA Florida St. Lucie Hospital. “Several years ago, the American Academy of Pediatrics published age-specific recommendations for screen time.
Today, the focus has shifted from simply limiting screens to emphasizing quality screen time.
Rather than just telling children they can’t have screen time, parents are encouraged to participate with them and have conversations about what they’re seeing and experiencing.”
Not all screen time is harmful. Educational programs and interactive learning games can reinforce reading, math, language development and creativity, and schools increasingly rely on technology as part of daily instruction. Dr. Lewis encourages parents to watch educational programs alongside their children, sing the songs, play the games and extend those lessons into real-world activities. Parents should also stay engaged with their child’s online school assignments so they can monitor progress and provide support.
“The reality is that screen time, whether it’s on a phone, tablet or television, is here to stay,” Dr. Lewis said. “While it may give parents a little extra time to cook dinner or finish chores, it’s our responsibility to make sure what they’re doing is safe.
“I have three young children of my own,” she added, “so I control what programs they have access to and encourage them to interact with each other. They happen to love Minecraft because it lets them build worlds using their imagination. They have to work together to create things, so they’re developing teamwork and problem-solving skills. It’s an even better learning experience when parents sit down and become part of that imaginary world.”
For infants and preschoolers, educational programming that promotes language, music and social development can be beneficial, but it should never replace face-to-face interaction. Young children learn by watching expressions, listening to tone of voice and engaging with people around them.
“What we don’t want is for children to miss those one-on-one interactions because that limits their ability to develop social skills,” Dr. Lewis explained. “Communication isn’t just verbal. It’s facial expressions, body language and other nonverbal cues. Children need peer-to-peer play to learn how to interact with people of different ages.”
Too much screen time can also interfere with healthy sleep. The blue light emitted from phones, tablets and computers suppresses melatonin, the hormone that helps regulate sleep. Since adequate sleep is essential for brain growth and development, Dr. Lewis recommends limiting screen use to daylight and evening hours outside the bedroom, shutting devices off at least an hour before bedtime and keeping phones and tablets out of children’s bedrooms overnight.
“Kids need to remain physically active,” she said. “I’m a firm believer in nature therapy. They need to touch the grass, breathe fresh air and soak up the sunshine. It’s good for us to reconnect with nature. It helps regulate our nervous system and can reduce anxious or depressive feelings.”
Screen overuse can also contribute to physical problems, including digital eye strain, headaches, neck and back pain from poor posture, and hearing damage from listening to loud music through earbuds.
“Parents can control the lighting, sound and programming through parental controls, and they should learn how to use those tools,” she said. “It’s up to parents to regulate what their children are seeing and hearing.”
But experts say not all screen time is created equal. Social media presents an entirely different set of challenges because children are no longer simply consuming content, they’re interacting with strangers, classmates and an online culture that can be arbitrary, senseless and cruel.
Research from the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention’s 2023 Youth Risk Behavior Survey found that nearly half of U.S. teenagers reported using social media several times each day, while about 1 in 6 high school students said they had experienced electronic bullying during the previous year.
Studies have linked excessive social media use with increased rates of anxiety, depression, poor self-esteem and sleep disturbances, particularly among adolescents who spend several hours each day online. The American Academy of Pediatrics recommends that parents know which apps their children use, maintain open conversations about online behavior, utilize privacy settings and parental controls, and teach children never to share personal information or respond to online harassment.
As shown in “Toy Story 5,” cyberbullying can take many forms, including cruel messages, spreading rumors, posting embarrassing photos or excluding someone from online groups.
Unlike traditional bullying, it often follows children home, making it difficult to escape. Experts encourage parents to watch for warning signs such as withdrawal from friends, declining grades, changes in sleep, anxiety after using a device or reluctance to attend school. Children should be reminded never to retaliate online. Instead, they should save evidence, block the offender, report abusive content to the platform and tell a trusted adult immediately.
Limiting screen time can be challenging, so establishing clear expectations before a device is turned on often prevents conflict later.
“It’s only fair that a child knows they have an hour to play,” Dr. Lewis said. “I personally find that setting a timer helps them understand when their time is up. This is especially helpful for children with autism or ADHD because they benefit from advance warnings. An abrupt interruption can easily lead to an unnecessary outburst.”
Perhaps the greatest lesson is that children learn how to use it by watching the adults around them.
If parents want children to look up from their screens, they must be willing to do the same.
Family movie nights become more meaningful when everyone watches together instead of checking notifications. Dinner conversations become richer when phones stay in pockets. Walks become adventures when no one is stopping to scroll.
Technology will continue to evolve, but childhood only happens once. The greatest memories most children will carry into adulthood won’t be found on a screen. Instead, they’ll be made in the moments when someone looked up, put the phone away and was fully present.
Dr. Lindsay Lewis is a board-certified family physician who has been practicing in South Florida for almost 20 years. She joined HCA Florida St. Lucie Hospital in 2019 where she works as both a hospitalist and outpatient physician while serving as the program director for the HCA Florida St. Lucie Hospital Family Medicine Residency program. Her office is located at HCA Florida St. Lucie Medical Specialists, 1881 SE Tiffany Ave., Suite 102, Port St. Lucie. The phone number is 772-398-7936.
