This week I had a TRAY Crispy Biscuits chat with a pair of liddle lady poocheroos, Perrier and Snitch, who totally look like sisters. But aren’t. They’re even both the same age, 14, an Woof do they ever NOT look old at all.
Soon as my assistant rang the bell, there was lotsa barkety-barkin’. When a Nice Lady opened the door, a liddle fluff muffin with Very Curly Golden Hair came bouncing up for the Wag-an-Sniff.
“Good morning!” I said. “I’m Bonzo and this is my assistant.”
“Good MORN-ning, Mr. Bonzo! I’m Snitch Stull an this is my Mom, Meredith, an my sister, Lucy. My big brother Ethan lives elsewhere. My Dad, Tom’s, back there.”
She pointed to a Nice Man standin’ across the room and he waved.
Then she pointed toward another liddle fluff muffin who looked like her ’cep her Very Curly Hair was beautiful black-an-white. “That’s my sister Perrier.”
Soon as another Nice Lady nex to her provided a reassurin’ liddle pat, Perrier approached for the Wag-an-Sniff.
“Good Day, Mr. Bonzo! Yep, it’s ME, Perrier Ritchings (everybuddy calls me Perri), an this is MY Mom, Karen. We’re super happy to meet you. I’m not ROOD; I’m jus’ more ruh-ZERVED than Snitch, an also a bit feisty.”
“No worries, Miss Perri,” I assured her. “It’s MY pleasure to meet you ALL! I understand you two have very different Tails to Tell.” I opened my notebook. “I’m ready when you are.”
“I’ll start, OK?” said Snitch, hoppin’ onto my assistant’s lap, where she offered happy liddle slurps an kisses, before beginning her Tail.
“So, Mom loves dogs but she has what’s called AL-err-gees, which means lotsa snufflin’ an sneezin’ and itchy eyeballs. An she hasta get SHOTS. Well, she really, really wanted a dog, but it hadda be one that is high-po-something-or-other, which means it doesn’t make hoomans snuffle or sneeze too much. Anyway, Thank Lassie, she found out that CockaPoos are high-po-whatever, an she found a BREE-der in Fellsmere, which is where I was born. Needles to say, we were ear-ree-ZISS-tubble. Speshully ME.”
“How’d you get your name?” I wondered.
“Well, see, Mom is a Big Harry Potter fan. You know about Harry Potter, right?”
“Of COURSE,” I replied.
“So Mom named me Snitch after that cool game they play, ridin’ broomsticks, trying to grab the Golden Snitch, an it kept ziggin’ and zaggin’ all over the place. Cook Kibbles, right? Since I’m gold an all?”
“Totally Cool Kibbles, for sure!” I agreed.
“Plus,” Snitch continued, “I have lotsa N-ergy! When I was a liddle pupper, I loved nibblin’ on ALL of Mom’s an Lucy’s PJ pant cuffs, with those pointy liddle puppy-teeth, which made ’em all Totally FRAYED. But I don’t do that anymore.”
Perrier, who’d been lounging nex to HER Mom (who’s Snitch’s Mom’s Mom. I think I got that right.), piped up. “I’ll tell my Tail now, OK?”
“Go for it, Grrrl!” replied Snitch.
“OK, so, I was scooped up off the street an saved from Dire Straits (I don’t ’member the DEE-tails) an taken to Small Dog Rescue in Or-LAN-do, you know, where that fay-muss mouse lives?”
I nodded.
“Anyway, I was real skinny an weak, cuzza not havin’ enuff food, an my hair was matted an ukky, an I only wayed 12 pouns.
“Meanwhile, Mom, who was livin’ in o-CAL-uh at the time, had already been adoptin’ dogs-less-FOR-chew-nut, when she saw me On Line. Even tho she didn’t ackshully, you know, NEED, another pooch, she decided to adopt me, Thank Lassie!”
“Woof, Perri, that’s a very scary tail. You’re one lucky poocheroo. So how’d you get to HERE?”
“It was when my Mom, and Snitch’s Mom an Dad decided they should all live together! So we MOVED! I think me an Snitch were about 1 anna haff at the time. We always get along grrreat, even tho we have preddy different doganalities. I’m not as, well, x-ZOOBER-rent as Stitch: I like to lounge on our OTTO-mun, an look BUE-dee-ful, an, I hafta admit, I still get a liddle, well, FOOD-uh-gress-ive is what hoomans call it, cuzza never knowin’ if I’d EVER eat again, when I was a stray. (I’m workin’ on that.)”
“Yeah, she’s tryin’ to not be so grumpy around food. I, however, am what you’d call an Oppor-TUNE-ist about food. I Zero In on random foodstuff that might get accidently dropped or something. An I tend to GOBBLE,” Snitch disclosed.
“We get to eat two times every day,” Perri elaborated. “Dinner’s at 5, SO, just to be sure nobody forgets, at 4:45, we both sit an STARE at Mama Karen.”
“We like to pile onto her lap,” Snitch added. “An lotsa times she plops down on the floor with us an plays Throw the Stuffy or Paw-Paws. SOME people think she spoils us, but WE think we Totally Deserve It.”
“Also, to maintain our Grrrlish Figures, we get leash walks around the lake,” Perri segued.
“Oooh, tell Bonzo about the DUCKS!” innerjected Snitch.
“Right! Yep, there are DUCKS in the lake. But there’s also ally-gaters. PLUS, cuz we’re nex to a pre-SERVE, there’s also ky-OTEES, which could gobble us Totally UP. So we don’t go out there unless Mom or Gramma or Lucy is with us. We don’t really like wader that much, anyway, ’cept in our bowls.”
“Any fave pooch pals or hoomans?”
“Oh, YESS! Wilson, he’s a Golden ReeTREEver; Ollie, a Great Dane; an Zoe, a terrier, I think.
Umm, an Aunt Gillian an Aunt Kim, an Bob an Judy. They stay with us when our family’s elsewhere,” said Perri.
“Do you like travlin’?”
“We DO! Me an Mom took a 6-week road trip to Suh-VANNA, an noo-JER-zee an upstate noo-YORK!”
“Me TOO,” added Snitch. “Me an Mom an Dad went to North Care-oh-LINE-uh an walked all over the woods (it’s called HIKING), an saw a lotta NAY-chur stuff. Anna RIVER!”
That hour had passed So Fast! Headin’ home, I was thinkin’ what a Totally Pawsome blended family Miss Perri an Miss Snitch have, an marvelin’, once again, at the amazin’ ways the right hoomans an the right pooches somehow find each other.
Till next time,
