This week I innerviewed a beauty-full fee-line, Lacey Richter, who, she thinks (an I totally buhleeve after hearing her tail), has used at least a few of her standard-issue 9 Lives, before at last finding her Furever Famly.
Becuz Lacey is Really Apprehensive around humans she doesn’t know, she didn’t answer the door.
Instead, a frenly lady invited us in. While we got situated, she left the room an returned with Lacey in her arms. Lacey is a Long-Haired, Torty-Point Siamese mixture: very x-ZAH-dic looking, with long thick dark and cream fur, dark, pointy ears an face, mottled paws an tail, an, on her shoulders, very long tufts of fur swooping down her back like angel wings Magical, I thought.
“Good afternoon, Miss Lacey,” I said in my Conversing-with-a-Cat voice. “I’m pleased you’ve consented to an innerview, an I assure you my assistant has a buh-loved cat companion, and is very kind an respectful to all cats.”
“Good afternoon, Mr. Bonzo.” Lacey’s voice was husky. “I’m certain that is true, an I sincerely welcome you both to my home. However, I will remain in my Mommy’s lap for the duration of the innerview, an I trust neither of you will take offense. You, Mr. Bonzo, are the first CAY-nine I’ve ever met. Or ever seen for that matter, an I’m duh-lighted to find that I feel absolutely no fear. Humans, tho, are another matter entirely. So, this is my Mommy Linda. An this,” (she looked up as a man entered the room) “is my Other Principal Human, Dennis. He’s Totally Cool Catnip. An,” she lowered her voice, “he lets me get away with stuff. Now then, how do we proceed?”
I opened my notebook. “It’s pretty simple,” I told her. “You tell me your story an I write it down.”
“Splendid! Stop me if I speak too rapidly. It was a cold an rainy day in Vero Lake Estates. I was a wee kitten, no more than 2 months, when I was spotted on the curb, shivery an soaking wet. I made my way toward a house to find shelter, an some humans opened the garage door. I was too cold an egg-ZAW-sted to be scared, so I went in.
“They probly wudda kept me, but they were uh-LURR-gic, so they called Mommy, who free-qwently helps stray cats find homes. She made a call, an I was taken to the vet to get checked out. I was a Mess: had a zillion fleas an some ghastly WORMS. It gives me the Utter Willies just thinkin’ about it. I hadda take strong medicine an one time I hadda SEE-zure. When I was well enough, Mom called several Cat Foster Frens an they all went to visit me at the vet’s, and I went to a Foster Home.
“Whenever the vet checks out a homeless kitty, they always figure how old it is, an assign a birth date. Mine was June 10, 2021. Mommy hadn’t met me in The Fur, but she saw a pickshur of me on the curb, wet and cold, an suggested my name should be Lacey, for some reason. (Soggy would’ve fit me better at that point.)
“After a few months, it became apparent no one was looking for me. I still hadda take meds but I’d grown bigger and was healthier, so I was put Up for Adop-shun. As it happened, Mommy’s long-time Siamese cat Sasha went to Cat Heaven on June 7, an, when Mommy found out the vet had set my birth date just three days later, June 10, she thought maybe Sasha had sent me to Mommy so she wouldn’t be All Sad. So Mommy an Dennis took me in, an I knew I’d found my Furever Home.”
“Oh, Miss Lacey,” I exclaimed, “that is a wonderful story!”
“Not quite, Mr. Bonzo. Not just yet.”
“Why? What happened?”
“I was a typical, ram-BUNK-shus kitten and, since I was feeling much better, me an Mommy an Dennis’ other two cats, Remi an Shea, who are about my age, all started zooming around the house, under stuff, over stuff, havin’ a noisy, bouncy, zoomy wonderful time. The three of us were Just Too Much For Mommy To Handle. She thought I was zoomy and ram-bunk-shus cuz I was competing with Remi an Shea for attention, an that I needed to be an Only Cat, to be SPESH-shull instead of part of a pack. As much as Mommy loved me, she decided to put me up for Adoption.”
“Wait! Wh-aat?” I blurted. “I thought …”
“Yes, I thought so to. I KNEW me an Mommy were MTB.”
“MTB?” I asked.
“Meant To Be. I tried to tell her, but sometimes humans just don’t see the Big Pick-shur.”
I nodded. “What happened?”
“Just one day after I was put up for adoption, a lovely young family adopted me. Until that day, I didn’t think Mommy would really let me go. But my new famly was great. They had a puh-lite liddle boy, anna frenly dog. They sent Mommy pickshurs to show I was doing well. But I missed my Furever Famly, an Mommy missed me. I had to DO something!
“Well, after about three months, my owner called Mommy an said they didn’t wanna do it but they were gonna hafta give me back. It seems that, although I was fine all day, I would meow an cry every night, all night long, night after night, an nobody could get any sleep.
“So I finally returned to my Forever Famly, for good this time. I’m Leader of the Pack. My favrite food’s whitefish an toona. I still hafta take a buncha of meds, but I’m So Happy. Mommy brushes me a lot cuz I am a CHAMP-eee-un shedder.
“From the screen porch, me an Remi an Shea stalk birds an practice our Crouch-and-Leap with a Really ob-NOCK-shus squirrel. An we sleep with Mommy an Dennis every night.”
Heading home, I was thinkin’ about My Own Furever Famly, an how you just know when you’re MTB.
Till next time,