All I can say is “Woof!” This week I innerviewed Ella Rosebud Kinkel, who’s an English Springer Spaniel like me. She was right there at the door, with her Dad, to greet me an my assistant, and trotted right over for the Wag-and-Sniff. She was a knock-out: black an white, silky coat, long, wavy black ears, anna a prance-y kinda walk that could wow the crowd at Westminster.
“Good mornin,’ y’all. Come’on in. Make yourselves comfy. This is my Daddy Steve. My Mama’s Kathy. She’s on an errand. Can ah offer you a biscuit? A bowl of water, perhaps?”
I like to think of myself as a suave dog-of-the-world, but my witty repartee suddenly went south. “Er, um, I’m good, thank you,” I said, grinning like a doof, as I nonchalantly picked my notebook up off the floor.
“Ah’m just so excited that you want to innerview little ol’ me. Ah got mah hay-uh styled at Groomingdale’s ’specially for you. Ah hope ah look OK.”
“Oh, yes, ma’m, Miss Ella. You look great,” I managed. “Um, so, let’s begin with where you’re from, originally, an how you met your Forever mom an dad. Are you, by chance, a southern girl?”
She laughed a soft little laugh. “Ah know I have a liddle drawl. Ah was born in Lexington, Kentucky, almost three years ago. I’m still 2 till next week. Mah en-TIE-uh famly is full of champions. Mah pooch Mama’s fancy name is Bonita’s Radiant Colors. Mah Daddy’s from California. His name’s Dalin’s. He’s in Love With Disney. Ah have no idea why. They’re both champion showdogs. Mah fancy name’s Bonita’s Ella Rosebud. Ah coulda been a showdog, too.”
“Why aren’t you?”
“Well, see, mah Daddy works with humans in assisted living places an humans who are in Hospice.”
“What’s that?” I asked.
“Well, the way ah understand it, it’s when a human is really, really sick an they’ll probly keep being sick, an their famly’s tryin’ to take the best care of ’em they can, which is sometimes hard to do an makes ’em worry. So the Hospice people help the sick human be comf-tubble an also help their families take good care of ’em, an know they’re not alone. Sometimes they stay at home an sometimes they stay inna real nice place called Hospice House. Anyway, Daddy wanted a therapy dog to go with him when he visits Hospice House, an Scully-Welsh, an Harbor Chase an the other special places. He did lotsa research an decided English Springers had the right sorta disposition.
“My litter mates all became showdogs, but Daddy an Mama picked me to be a therapy pooch an, Mister Bonzo, it is a great honor. Ah had to get specially trained an, ah’m proud to say, ah got certified last fall. Me an Daddy work with the VNA an the Cleveland Clinic. Ah have my own Cleveland Clinic card, with mah PICK-shur. We visit patients. Ah give them lotsa love an soft liddle nose bumps, an sometimes just lean against them. I’ve even stayed real close by when they were getting ready to cross the Rainbow Bridge. Daddy says ah’m a COM-fort.”
I was moved, an remembered bein’ a COM-fort for my own Mom. I wiped my eyes. Miss Ella was so much more than just a (very, very) pretty face. “What was it like with your new Mom an Dad at first?”
“Ah was only 8 weeks old when Daddy an Mama brought me home. For the first couple nights I was inna soft crate, which ah totally demolished in about three days. (Puppy teeth, you know). So they got another one. I didn’t like it ONE LITTLE BIT. Now I do. But just to sleep in. My secret wish is to sleep with Daddy an Mama.
“One time ah chewed one of Daddy’s flip-flops All Up. Ah was sternly told NO, an ah Never Did It Again. Daddy an Mama had a previous pooch, Louie, who went to Dog Heaven when he was 15. Louie’s favorite toy was a stuffed parrot, which he Never Chewed. Now, Daddy makes a parrot noise an throws it, an ah retrieve it. But ah NEVER Chew It. Ah also have a Very Big Pink Stuffed Pig. Ah’ll show you.”
Ella trotted off and returned with the Very Big Pink Stuffed Pig in her mouth. So big she kept tripping over it. I tried, unsuccessfully, not to laugh.
“Shee, id’s mah fay-brit.” She dropped it at my feet. “Ah do sorta chew it a liddle. But not all the way UP. But ah do believe in good dental high-jean. Daddy brushes mah teeth daily at 8 p.m., with an uh-lectric toothbrush. That’s why they’re so white. It’ important to have fresh breath, ’specially when I’m visitin’ folks.”
“Well, they sure are white. Do you swim?”
“Daddy made me learn, but ah greatly dislike bein’ in water. Louie was the same. What ah do like is running around with mah pooch frens. There’s Sophie, she’s a rescue, an her sister, ah can’t remember her name. Then, um, there’s Casey, a Fox Terrier, an Murphy, a Golden Retriever. Ah usta chase lizards but I outgrew that. Now I chase frogs.”
“Do you wear, like, bandanas or anything?”
“Not really. One time, a human we were visiting said I looked like a boy. Can you buh-LEAVE it? So now I have red, white an blue bows on my black harness and white and blue polka dot bows on my blue harness.”
“Any tricks?”
“Goodness, no. How silly. Ah am very well-behaved, how-evah. For example, Daddy can set a duh-licious snack smack in front of me and ah will sit an wait til he gives the go-ahead.”
I couldn’t buh-lieve how fast the time had gone by. Heading home, I was thinking about Miss Ella’s extremely important job, helping humans in a way only a very special dog can. An thinkin’ how glad I am that we had swapped business cards. Now I have her number.
Till next time,
The Bonz
