Bonz: A German aristocrat who runs a golf course

This week’s interview was with a German Short-haired Pointer, Rocco Gardner. He’s 10, a good lookin’ pooch, about 80 pounds, long aristocratic nose, white and that color Humans call liver (uck!). His ancestors were Very Big in German Dog Society. His pedigree name is Rocco Tucker Scavone and his great-grandfather was a German National Champion, for Lassie’s Sakes! But he doesn’t brag about it, he’s just a friendly, laid-back pooch.

Rocco is Special Assistant to his human Dad, who’s Director of Golf at Sebastian Municipal Golf Course, so that’s where we decided to meet. When we arrived, Rocco was hanging out with some other employees in the golf shop, where his office is. “Hey, Bonzo, c’mon in, have a sit down. This is my Dad, Greg. Sorry it’s taken so long, we’ve been real busy – budget time, y’know.”

“I hear ya,” I said. “This is some cool setup. How’d you get here?”

“You’ve seen my Papers so you know I come from a breeder. As a pupster, back in ‘05, I was sold to a retired couple, and I wasn’t cheap, either, I can tell you. They had to promise that if they couldn’t handle me they had to give me back to the Breeder. And they did.”

“How come?” I asked.

“Not ‘cuz I’m mean or anything; it’s just that my breed needs tons of attention and exercise, and pretty soon they realized it was just too much. Well, here’s the neat part. See, my Forever Mom and Dad (she’s Linda) lost their pooch, Scout, just a couple months earlier, and they were still really sad. One of their friends knew about me and told them that the breeders were looking for a good home for me. I was all paid for and had all my shots and stuff. So, as Dad says, I just fell into their laps.”

“That is a PAWsome story,” I agreed.

“I know! Right? Plus, Scout was a Pointer, like me.”

“Was it hard adjusting to your new home?”

“Gosh no … Well, the first night was pretty bizarre. I was still doing puppy stuff, poking around, and just before my new family picked me up, I got into the breeder’s garbage can and ate a whole lot of coffee grounds.”

“Whaa-aat?”

“I was way wired from that, plus going to a whole new place – I was pretty bounced out. But next morning I was fine and discovered I had, like, the best family ever! There’s Mom and Dad, my human sisters Haley and Madison; two other pooches, Ginger Fox – she’s a Pomeranian – and Jax, a Golden Retriever, bigger than me and he’s not even a year old. We play Tug-of-War. Then there’s the cats, Snoopy and Kitten.”

Cats? I had to ask, “How’s that workin’ for you?”

“Oh, hey, no problem. I really dig our blended family. Well, sometimes I do gently push Kitten around with my nose. Sorta like a fluffy little ball, y’know? But I wouldn’t ever hurt her. I did eat a couple pairs of Mom’s glasses when I was still a pupster. But I’m a quick learner.”

“You get lots of exercise, right?”

“Tons! Me and dad are exercise buddies. He rides his bike and holds my leash and I trot alongside. We’ve put in lots of miles together. And I love assisting Dad here at the golf course. There are ibis and sandhill cranes to chase and to practice my pointing on (but not catch). I don’t swim in our pool like Jax, but I sometimes swim in the lake, and Dad keeps an eye out for gators. At home, I patrol the yard for squirrels and land crabs. And I run the fence line and bark real loud when people go by. I can sound pretty ferocious, but I’m really a nice pooch.”

“Waddya eat?”

He grinned. “Dad says I’m a Non-stop Eater. I like to say I’m just not picky. Humans are always giving me snacks. Drives Dad nuts, but I tell him I just exercise it off. Plus, I get healthy meals: veggies, lamb with rice, and glucosamine for Mental Alertness. But NO BANANAS OR LETTUCE! NO WAY!!!”

“You have a great coat,” I observed. “Hard to keep up?”

“Naw, grooming’s easy-peasy ‘cuz I’m short-haired. I get baths when I need ‘em. And I love getting vacuumed!”

“Beg pardon?”

My humans vacuum my loose hair right off with a long hose thingy. It is so relaxing. You should try it. Oh, and, look!” He opened his mouth wide and bared his teeth. They were really white.

“My Dad puts this special enzyme powder on my food and it helps keep my teeth clean.”

“Wow,” I said, with admiration. “They look like puppy teeth!”

Just then another human came in and right away started playing with Rocco. “This is my babysitter, Wes. He works here, too,” Rocco said. “I have sleep-overs at his place. I love hanging out with Wes.”

“Do you have a BFF?”

“Well, I guess it’d be Madison. We’re Besties.” He learned forward and whispered, “but don’t tell Dad.”

Heading home, I was thinking about how white Rocco’s teeth were. I bet he’s a real poodle magnet.

Till next time,

The Bonz

Comments are closed.