VERO BEACH — After 18 months away from the game that was cruelly taken away from him by a debilitating anxiety disorder, Mardy Fish told VeroNews.com in an exclusive interview that he has decided to return to the professional tennis circuit.
Fish said he will launch his comeback in March at the BNP Paribas Open in Indian Wells, Calif.
“It’s very exciting,” Fish, who grew up in Vero Beach, said Wednesday night. “I’ve been working extremely hard. I’m on my 10th week of practice and have six more to go until the tournament.”
He said he will play doubles, probably with his former coach, Mark Knowles, in a $100,000 USTA Pro Circuit Challenger event next week in Dallas.
Fish, 33, hasn’t played in an ATP World Tour event since Aug. 21, 2013, when he retired in the third set of his third-round match against Jarkko Nieminen at the Winston-Salem Open.
“It’s been a rough couple of years, but he’s worked really hard to recover and overcome this thing,” said Fish’s father, Tom, the tennis director at Windsor, a barrier island community north of Vero Beach. “He always wanted to play again, and it’s still a daily battle for him.
“But he’s finally getting comfortable enough to do it.”
Fish, who turned pro in 2000 at age 18, has won six Tour singles titles and reached the quarterfinals at the Australian Open (2007), U.S. Open (2008) and Wimbledon (2011). He also has played on the U.S. Davis Cup team, compiling an 11-8 record in singles and doubles in 11 matches from 2002 through 2012.
After embracing a late-career commitment to fitness and diet, Fish dropped 30 pounds and played the best tennis of his life, climbing as high as No. 7 in the world rankings in 2011. But in early 2012, he began experiencing severe cardiac arrhythmia, which produced frightening palpitations and pounding in his chest.
In May of that year, he underwent a procedure to correct faulty electrical connections in his heart. The problem was fixed. His heart was fine and he was medically cleared to resume his tennis career.
But he couldn’t.
The terrifying episodes, which he said occurred mostly when he was asleep at night and made him feel “as if my heart was going to explode in my chest,” and left a scar on his psyche. The extent of that mental scar was known only to his wife, parents and closest friends.
Fish did occasionally hint at the problem in interviews, using words like “demons” and “panic” and “anxiety,” but he was cautious about providing details until finally divulging the diagnosis last spring.
“A severe anxiety disorder has been the culprit,” Fish told Vero Beach 32963 in May. “It’s an illness I fight every day. It’s something I have to deal with every day, and I do. I see professionals every week. I work on it every day. That’s the reason I couldn’t go back to tennis.”
At that time, Fish was attempting to embark on a second career as a professional golfer.
In the fall of 2013, Fish competed in two tournaments on the All-American Gateway Tour — a developmental circuit for up-and-coming pros hoping to someday play on the PGA Tour — in Arizona. He failed to make the cut in either event, shooting 78-75 in both, but he was encouraged by his performance.
Last spring, he picked up his first paycheck as a professional golfer, finishing in a tie for fifth in the La Quinta Dunes Shootout, a Golden State Tour event in California. He then entered the U.S. Open local qualifying tournament at TPC Valencia (outside L.A.) and, after shooting a 1-over-par 73, birdied the first hole of a five-man playoff to claim the first alternate spot.
He said his pursuit of a professional golf career has “saved his life,” getting him out of the house and giving him another opportunity to compete.
But he never officially retired from tennis.
“The way my career has stopped, and probably ended, is not the way athletes want to go out,” Fish said last May. “I had a great career, and tennis has given me a lot of great things in my life. I miss the game and the competition, especially when the big tournaments come around. A big part of me wants to go out on my terms.
“My career was taken away from me when I was at the top of my game, and there wasn’t anything I could do about it,” he added. “That’s a tough pill to swallow. But I can’t go back right now.”
That was eight months ago.
Now, he believes, he can come back. Several weeks ago, he was seen practicing with Grigor Dmitrov — a Wimbledon semifinalist last year, the 23-year-old Bulgarian was seeded No. 10 at the ongoing Australian Open, where he lost in fourth round to Andy Murray — in Los Angeles.
“I’m surprised he’s doing it this soon,” Tom Fish said of his son’s decision to return to the court. “I thought it might be this summer, but he’s excited about playing again and I’m thrilled.
“I’ve never been to the Indian Wells tournament, so this might be a good time to go.”
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