Hi, pet buddies. My interviewee this week was one of the most sociable mutts I’ve ever met, with tons of pep and a lot of good stories. He’s a Pug and his name is – wait for it – Pugsley. He’s pale fawn with a squished-up black face and ears. He’s got huge round black eyes and a very curly tail. And he’s built like a loaf of bread.
Pugsley’s human parents are Nicole and Brad Raynor and he has a human sister, Ashley, two human brothers, Dustin and Dylan, and a cat step-brother, Joey. For a lot of the interview, he was sitting on Ashley’s lap, resting his front paws on the dining room table. As we yapped, Dustin brought out a couple of apparently indestructible squeaky toys, a dog and a duck, and put them in front of Pugsley, who immediately grabbed the duck by the head and began munching.
“I noticed how nicely you fit up at the table. Do you eat with the family?” I asked.
“We’ll I don’t sit here for actual meals. But I do like to join in their card games sometimes. Oh, and you should see me at the wheel of the car! And I even dressed up in my cat step-brother’s dragon costume for Halloween! I think I have a bunch of pictures if you wanna see.”
Before I could say “What the Woof?” he ker-thunked to the floor. “But first off, you gotta watch this. I love, love, love baby carrots so-ooo much. Nice and cool, right out of the fridge. Check this out.”
He stood in front of the fridge, clicking his toenails on the kitchen tile. His mom got out a little bag of carrots.
She said, “lie down” and he sat. She said, “roll over” and he sat. He was really excited. Then Dustin came over and said in a very important 12-year-old voice. “LIE DOWN!” Boom, down he went.” Now, ROLL OVER!” commanded Dustin. He rolled over and over until I was feeling a little dizzy.
“Speak!” said Dustin. “Woof!”
“Louder!”
“WOOF!”
“It’s all about how you ask,” Pugsley said, through a mouthful of cold baby carrots.
“I get regular dog food in the morning, but at night, I get a half a can of my special green beans with no salt. VERY delish and good for me.”
“What’s with all these dogs eating veggies,” I wondered. “It doesn’t seem very carnivore-y.”
“I read your column so I know what you usually ask,” Pugsley continued.
“Cool. He’s a fan! And he’s done his homework,” I thought.
“I’m an indoor dog. Sometimes, I’m playing with my brothers and I get to running around so fast, my tail totally straightens out. But I have this condition, like lots of Pugs. Our noses are so little and squashed, we don’t have a lot of nose space to breath, so we run out of breath very fast, especially outside when it’s hot. On walks, I usually just have to quit about halfway, then my sister or brothers carry me the rest of the way. But I make up for it by being very smart – and cute.
“Here’s something my family is REALLY proud of. See that little bell over by the door? WELL when I have to go potty, I actually ring it so they let me out. And, if we’re going somewhere in the car, they take me outside on my leash and tell me to pee and poop before the trip. And I DO. On comMAND!” He was really proud of himself.
“Wow! How do you even DO that?” I was very impressed, but hoping my mom wouldn’t find out and get any ideas.
“You have quite a family,” I told him. “How did you all find each other?”
“Well, Mom wasn’t much of a dog fan at first, but the rest of the family really wanted a dog. She’s like, ‘Oh, all right, but it has to be small and a pupster, so it can grow up with the kids.’ She decided on a Pug (I mean, who wouldn’t, right?) and finally found me down in Miami.
“When they first brought me home, my dad and big sister knocked themselves out cuddling me and playing with me and giving me stuff. And Mom just sort of ignored me. You know, not a dog person. Anyhow, one day, for no reason, she sat on the floor and started throwing my ball across the room. ‘Here’s my chance,’ I thought. So I grabbed it and brought it back to her, and she kept throwing and I kept bringing it back to her. And just like that, we bonded. It surprised both of us. So now I’m Officially Mom’s Dog.”
Nicole said, “Yep. He just found this little spot in my heart. I think pets choose their people.”
Pugsley and I looked at each other and tried not to laugh.
“Well, duh,” he said.
Til Next Time,
The Bonz
