Bonz falls head over paws for mesmerizing Missy

PHOTO BY KAILA JONES

This week I enjoyed a Crispy Biscuits yap with Missy “Yoda” Beveridge-Norris, an eee-BOO-lee-unt liddle rescue pooch with a short, sorta wavy gold coat. Missy greeted me an my assistant with puh-light wiggles anna big smile, trotting right up for the Wag-an-Sniff.

I fluffed my ruff an looked into her sparkly brown eyes. “Good morning, Miss Beveridge-Norris. It’s a great pleasure.”

She laughed a tiny liddle laugh, an innerduced her Mom, Gail. “Likewise! I’ve never been innerviewed. I don’t know if my story is exciting or anything, but I’m SO excited to share it. Please come in.”

Missy led us Into her livin’ room, which faced a nice yard anna path along a liddle lake. I opened my notebook, an Missy delicately nosed about in my assistant’s Satchel, wherein a bag of treats resides. She got the OK from her Mom, delicately nibbled her treat, one half atta time, then began her tail.

“I’m hazy about some of my life buh-fore I got rescued. I was a young single mama, about 2 (I’m about 6 now), when me an my four puppies were found on a street in Fellsmere. I was tired, weak, an very afraid for my babies. Then, just when I thought we were DOOMED, some humans scooped us all up an took us to a wonderful, safe place called HAY-low, where very kind humans got us tidied up and fed. One of ’em, Miss Jackie, took us to her house for the whole time my puppies needed their Mommy Milk. Then, when they were old enough, HAY-low found Forever Homes for all of them. I can’t tell you how ruh-LEEVED I was.”

“But what about you?”

“Well, my future forever Mom had a Westie-Poo, Susie. When Susie was Really Really old in Dog (12 in human), she Went to Dog Heaven. After a year, Mom decided It Was Time to look for another pooch like Susie: She found a breeder in a state called Indy-ANNA, but they didn’t have any puppies at the time, so she decided to check with HAY-low.

“They didn’t have any Westie-Poos, but Miss Jackie heard Mom explainin’ what kinda dog she wanted, and told Mom about me. So Mom came to meet me: She was so nice, Mr. Bonzo, but, even though I was all clean and healthy, I was still pretty skinny and a liddle rag-tag lookin’, an I was afraid she wouldn’t want me. But, Thank Lassie, she knew right away I was The Dog. An I knew it, too!”

I wiped my nose with my paw. I always feel a liddle Wet-Eyes when The Ex-ackly-Right Pooch an the Ex-ackly-Right Human find each other.

“The HAY-low humans called me Bambi, but Mom decided Missy was my ackshul name. I like it, don’t you?”

“It suits you,” I agreed.

“Plus, Mom had my D(og)NA checked and guess what? I’m a Poo-Chi-Pom!”

“Er … a what?”

“A Poodle, Chihuahua an Pomeranian mixture.”

“Cool Kibbles!” I exclaimed. “It does have a ring to it.”

“An guess what else? Mom made my middle name Yoda. Wanna know why?”

“Um, yes, ackshully,” I admitted.

“OK. Look!”

She smiled, then stuck her ears straight up like sailboat sails. She looked Very Alert. Then she folded her ears over, stuck ’em out to the sides an gazed straight at me. I hadda laugh. Yep, totally Yoda.

“Woof! That’s huh-LARRY-us!”

“I KNOW! Right?”

“So, tell me all about life with your Forever Mom.”

“Well, not to brag, but I am very smart, an affectionate an what Mom calls in-TOOEY-tive. Like, I always know how she feels, an whether to be all bouncy an playful or quiet an snuggly. Me an Mom take care of each other. Also, I don’t remember how I learned it, but I always knew where to Do My Duty an where to Not. No accidents ever!”

“Impressive,” I said, with admiration.

“I am, I hafta admit, a Climber. (Often chocolate or snacks are involved. I’m stealthy, don’t leave a trace, but Mom says the suspect list is limited.) I can get out of or up on pretty much anything: countertops, tables, crates, fences, gates, boxes. Don’t Fence Me In: That’s my motto. So Mom gives me freedom. Not outside, of course.

“I remember, this one time, Mom hadda fren over for lunch. There was bread-an-budder on the table. Then her fren pointed an said, ‘Um, Gail, what’s that?’ Mom looked an saw funny marks in the budder. She ree-lized they were toothmarks. Mine. She quickly switched the budder, an decided not to tell her fren the DEE-tails. I had eaten almost the whole stick an, Woof! Was I sick. So I learned to NEVER eat budder EVER AGAIN.

“Me an Mom love hangin’ out on the screenporch. I greet our pooch an human neighbors walkin’ by. An I AM a watchdog if I need to be. That’s when I do my Big Dog Bark. (Also when this one squirrel climbs up the screen.) It makes me Totally Woofin’ NUTS! Then I bark my ears off. So Mom throws a pillow at the screen an the squirrel splits. On the other paw, the birds are Cool Kibbles. Mostly CAR-duh-nulls. Mom feeds ’em. I’ve learned some Basic Bird. Just enough to say hi.

“I also like leash walks, an my pals at Canine Country Club. My BFF is CB, he’s even liddler than me, looks like a teeny teddy bear. I hafta be real gentle with him. I can swim, but I don’t like it that much. Oh, an I won a Halloween contest dressed up in a Sombrero, ruffles an a tutu.

“At night me an Mom get in bed an I get a chewstick while we watch TV. My favrite is ‘NCIS’, cuzza Mark Harmon. Then I get down, into my own cozy bed. I am such a lucky grrrl!”

Headin’ home, I was thinkin about how adorable Missy looked, tellin’ me her story, sittin’ all ladylike, paws crossed daintily in front of her, ears up. Sigh.

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