Bonz chats with lovely Laci, a sociable Sato

Woof, is it hot! I hope all you pooches are stayin’ cool an slurpin’ lotsa water during the “Dog Days of Summer.” I wondered why it’s called that: Google says the ancient Romuns named those days cuz the Dog Star, Sirius, was in the sky during the hottest part of summer. Sirius was the brightest star EVER, and it hung out with a star group called Canis Major, which means “Big Dog.”

So, anyway, this week I yapped with Laci Malenfant, a sweet little Sato. I ackshully knew what that is cuz a coupla years back I innerviewed another Sato, Nola Kratz. (A Sato is a stray pooch from Puerto Rico, where it’s very scary to be a stray pooch.)

Laci an her Mom and Dad were right out front, waitin’ to greet us. She was a dainty, mostly black pooch, with a frenly face an cute ears that sorta lapped over.

“Good morning. I’m Bonzo and this is my Assistant. I’m so pleased to meet you, Miss Laci.”

She looked up to her Mom an Dad for the “OK,” then came over for the Wag-n-Sniff. “It’s my pleasure, Mr. Bonzo. This is my Mommy, Mary Jean, an my Daddy, Bill. If you don’t mind, I’m gonna just take a quick roll in the grass before we go inside. I love grass. It’s so soft an cool, great for nappin’ an rollin,’ an just hangin’ out.”

After a few energetic, paws-up, rolls, right-to-left, left-to-right, she led the way in. I’d worried whether I shoulda Boned Up on my Spanish, but breathed an inconspicuous sigh of relief when she spoke great Dog English. “So, tell me about how you got here from Puerto Rico,” I suggested, opening my notebook.

“I was a very lucky Sato, Mr. Bonzo. I don’t remember much about life in the streets or on the beach, cuz my litter got saved when we were just tiny puppies. See, there are these groups of humans here on the mainland who unnerstand how scary an dangerous it is for us Satos, and they work with Sato Rescue groups in Puerto Rico who scoop us up and fly us to shelters over here. We got sent to the Sterling Animal Shelter in Mass-uh-chooo-suts, an that’s where Mommy an Daddy found me. Daddy saw a picksure of my litter on The NET. He called Mommy, an went to see us in the fur. My brothers and sisters ran up to Daddy,  bein’ all Cute Puppy. I was sitting, very ladylike, on my blanket. Then I came over an gave Daddy lots of licks to let him know I was the pooch he was looking for. He unnerstood right away. I was 12 weeks old then. Now I’m 12 years old. I was SO LUCKY!

“First time I saw snow, I thought some pooch was gonna be in Big Trouble for tearing a pillow apart. Then I ree-lized it was Super Cool Kibbles to play in, throw it around, dig in it. It was Chilly Paws, but I loved it.”

“Sounds fun! But it musta been kinda weird, coming down here where it’s so hot, and we got sand insteadda snow.”

“It was puzz-ling at first. I really missed my pals, too, ’specially my boyfriend Bentley, he’s a Burmese Mountain Dog; an Diesel, he’s a St. Bernard; Cooper’s a mix like me; Marcie’s a Boston Terrier; an my BFF’s Bailey.”

“When did you move down?”

“I was a snowbird-dog ’til last October. That’s when we moved per-muh-nutly. I have lotsa pooch pals here, now. There’s Roxi, she’s a big mix; Spartacus, a black Lab; Daisy, she’s a mix (we’re sorta frienemies, cuz we sometimes get on each other’s Last Nerve); my newest fren is Dixie, she’s a Beagle; Sam’s a boxer; an Abby’s a Catahoola. An then there’s Teddy, he’s my boyfriend. He’s a Cavalier King Charles. An he has a big crush on me.” she giggled and lowered her voice. “I like him a lot, too, but don’t tell him, OK?”

“Not a word, Miss Laci,” I promised. “You’re a very social girl!”

“Well, I love pooches, an humans, cats even. There’s a human in our neighborhood who pedals around on a 3-wheeler handin’ out Treats. I can spot him a mile away. And the liddle humans around here are great. They love me an I love them. But I do eat more treats than I probly should, an ‘m getting’ a liddle tubby around the middle. So me an Mommy walk a lot.

“Up north, when me an Daddy were walkin,’ this liddle, funny-lookin’ pooch came up an rubbed against Daddy’s ankle, an Daddy patted its head; so I went over for the wag-an-sniff, an it rubbed against me, too, an, after that, it’d join us on our walks. I didn’t ree-lize it was a cat ’til years later.”

“Didja ever do any goofy puppy stuff back in your youth? Like, you know, chew shoes?”

“Well, not shoes. But this one time, Mommy fell asleep on the couch an, when she woke up, there was this pile of sawdust on the floor. I had accidentally chewed the leg of the couch almost all up. Also, I don’t eat my kibbles at the bowl. I prefer to take a nice mouthful and go to the dining room. I mean, that’s where Mommy an Daddy dine, right? An, if they should happen to forget my mealtime, I sit smack in front of ’em and give ‘em The Look.

“But sometimes, Mr. Bonzo, I need some Me Time. So I go out to the screen porch an just listen to the birds an think about how lucky I am. It’s so Zen.”

Heading home, I was thinkin’ about the Dog Star, up in the sky with the other Big Dog stars. I wonder if Canis Major is anywhere near Dog Heaven, cuz there’s a lotta bright shining dog stars there, too.

Till next time,

The Bonz

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