This week I yapped with a Chocolate Lab puppy, Brewster Bowin. He’s 9 anna half months old and Totally Lab-by: sweet, frenly an adorable. Of course, he was Right At The Door to greet me an my assistant an, after the Wag-an-Sniff, escorted us to the living room.
“I’m sorta nervous, Mr. Bonzo. I never had an innerview before. But I’m mostly excited! I’ve been practicin’ bein’ puh-lite. So, um, I’m Brewster Bowin an this is my Mommy, Christine. My Daddy Adam’s at work.”
“Well, you’re doin’ a fine job, Brewster!” I assured him. “I understand you have a Serious Story and an Important Safety Tip you wanna share.”
“That’s right, Mr. Bonzo. I almost bought the doghouse, an my life has changed forever. So I figured at least I can help Fellow Pooches by warnin’ ’em about the dangers that could LURK in their very own yards.”
“I’ll do my best, Brewster.” I opened my notebook. “How ’bout start with your Forever Family.”
“OK. Well, Mommy’d been wanting a boy Chocolate Lab puppy for a long time. Her fren was raisin’ purebred Labs, with PAY-pers even, an a litter was on the way. Mommy got all excited, but there weren’t any chocolate boys, so she waited for the next litter. Last Sept. 12, MY litter arrived, with TWO of us chocolates. Imagine the Adorable Factor. But I was the one who ran right to Mommy. She scooped me up, an THAT was THAT. She named me Brewster cuz her childhood Golden Lab was Punky, after some liddle girl on TV.
“I was One Happy Puppy. I had my very own Forever Famly: a sister, Xena, she’s a Husky. I call her Sissy. She’s my Best Fren. She showed me The Ropes. I also have a dachshund sister an brother who are Really Old in Dog, like, a hundrud: Daphne, she’s 14 in people, an Tolbert’s 16. (We call him T.) Sissy clued me in right away that they Rule the Roost. They even have their own bedroom for whenever me an Sissy get on their Last Nerve.
“Anyway, everything was Cool Kibbles ’til, one day when I was about 2 months old an we we’re still livin’ in a rental house, I was puppyin’ around in the backyard an I spotted these really innersting trees with fluffy tops, kinda short bottoms an lotsa duhlicious-looking berries. So I ate ’em. All up.”
“Oh, no!” I exclaimed, pretty sure what was coming next.
“That night, I got a terrible tummy ache and started barfing. Mommy didn’t know what was wrong with me. She was so scared. She rushed me to the vet, who figured out I had eaten, like, 50 berries from a tree called a Sago Palm. Sago Palms are poisonous to pooches, an liddle humans. They can damage dogs’ livers (one of our inside parts we can’t see but it’s Very Importunt) an even cause ackshull death. My liver was damaged real bad. I almost went to Dog Heaven. Mommy still gets upset just thinking about it. She didn’t have any idea those pretty trees were dangerous. You probly see ’em all over the place. They’re real popular. But they’re also pooch poison.
“Sissy an Daphne an T. unnerstood how sick I was. They all babied me an stayed real close. I even got something called aaa-Q-punk-sure, which looks a liddle weird, but it didn’t hurt, an it made me feel relaxed. That was six months ago. Now I’m doing Much Bedder, I don’t barf as much, thank Lassie, but my liver can’t do its job without help. I don’t weigh enough yet, an I don’t have nor-mull Puppy Energy. I’ll always hafta take holistic meds an SUPP-luh-ments, an eat only Special Mommy-cooked Food.
“But no complaints, Mr. Bonzo. We’re a Snuggly Family! I’m a lucky puppy, anna Mommy’s Boy. I love ridin’ in the truck. An sittin’ in Mommy’s lap, even though I hang over the edges. An we all snuggle with Daddy. Every Sunday I help Mommy do my Weekly Meal Prep. Well, she ackshully does it. I supervise. It is Majorly Tasty! All organic: turkey, beef, chiggen, eggs, cottage cheese, sammon, sweet potadoes, an my Favorite, SPINACH.”
“Yum! So, whaddya do for fun?”
“Bein’ a Lab, Swimmin’s No. 1, pool or ocean. Me an Sissy walk on the beach, an watch Daddy shore fishin’ and Mommy shellin.’ When I get home all sandy, Daddy hoses me off and Mommy blow-dries me. Pawsome! I like goin’ to the dog park an playin’ Fetch. Sometimes I go to work with Mommy an hang out with The Nice Office Ladies. There’s a real comf-tubble couch there.
“Oh, an I gotta funny story. Well, Mommy didn’t think it was that funny. Last Easter, we were in the middle of moving to here. Movers were goin’ in an out. Mommy called me, but I didn’t come like I usually do. She called some more. No me. I was real liddle, and she was scared to bits I had slipped out with the movers and something terrible had happened to me. So the neighbors hadda party to search for me. Everybody was runnin’ around in their Sunday clothes looking under bushes an hollerin’ ‘HERE, BREW-STERRR!!!!’ After almost an hour, Mommy found me. I was snoozin’ in the clothes hamper in Mommy’s closet, and somebody’d closed the door. Mommy took a pickshur. We have really nice neighbors.”
“Indeed you do,” I agreed, gathering my stuff. “It’s been great yapping with you Brewster. Your story could save a life.”
“Me an Mommy just want other pooches an their humans to NEVER have to go through what we did.”
Heading home, I was feeling glad that Brewster shared his story with me, so I can share it with you, an you can tell your dog buddies. I bet lotsa you didn’t know how dangerous Sago Palms are to us pooches, cats and liddle humans. I sure didn’t.
Till next time,
The Bonz
