I had a fun yap with a coupla Cavalier King Charles Spaniels this week, Milo Niemczyk (NIM-zick) an his (step) sister Morgan, both with those totally adorable, puppy-sweet King Charles faces an frenly dispositions. Milo’s 2, and he was born in Ireland, then went to a kennel in Georgia, so I was wonderin’ if he’d be like, “Top o’ the morning,’ ya’ll.” But he spoke just plain ol’ dog, no accent or anything.
After the Wag-an-Sniff, we got all comftubble, an Milo introduced me to his Mom an Dad, Carolyn an Leo. “Happy to met you all,” I said. “So, Milo, do you remember anything about Ireland?”
“Not really, Mr. Bonzo. I was only a liddle furball. I do remember seein’ lotsa fluffy funny-lookin’ white animals on the ride to the airport. I thought they were some kinda dogs, but I found out they were cheeps.”
“Cheeps? Oh, right! I gotcha.”
“Anyway, Mom an Dad have always been a Spaniel Family. Springers like you, an Brittanys.
“They had Oscar, Nelson an Brutus. Then, when they were low on spaniels, they decided to get a smaller size so it could fly in the human section. They had Morgan already so they were checkin’ out puppy pickshurs online. See, even though we were officially hunting dogs, us Cavalier King Charleses are SO CUTE that, a long time ago, Royal Humans made us pets, ’specially the fancy ladies, an they had PORtrutts painted with us in their LAPS.
“Anyway, Mom an Dad picked ME! So Mom got up at 4 a.m. an flew to Atlanta, cuz I was in Lula, Georgia, an planes don’t go there. The kennel lady was gonna bring me to the airport, then her an Mom were gonna do a Hand-off. Of me. It was rainin,’ an me an the kennel lady were late, so Mom grabbed me (she was wearing those funny lady shoes called heels an I was in liddle bag, shakin’ cuz of bein’ nervous) an we were bookin’ though the airport to catch the plane to Florida.”
“Woof!” I exclaimed. “That’s a lotta excitement!”
“Totes! I was seein new stuff, hearin’ new sounds, smellin’ new smells. I finally fell asleep an pretty much napped ’til we got to my Forever Home. I was still shaky, and hopin’ my new Dad an big sister would like me. WELL we got to the house, an Mom set me down. The instant I spotted Morgan I was like, ‘OH, WOW! This is GREAT!’ She looked like my Mom an all my brothers and sisters an cousins. And I knew I was HOME!!
“Morgan wanted to be sure I unnerstood that she owns the house, an that was Totally Cool Kibbles with me. She’s the BEST! She taught me everything I know.”
Morgan chimed in. “Yes I did. We bonded right away. He was a fun liddle pupster. He’s a smarty, but mostly I hadda protect him from himself. He’s curious about EVERYthing!”
“Mom bought me a buncha toys an I ate ’em!” Milo declared happily. “But that was when I was liddle. NOW I’m much more neat and tidy. When we go outside, I wait patiently in my crate (we love our crates) ’til Mom an Morgan are ready. An I always Do My Doodie in the Same Spot.
“We do leash walks, of course, but, Dog! I love to run! Dad says that’s my spaniel instinks coming out. An we both can’t wait to go to PetSmart. Talk about Dog Frenly!”
“We sniff everything an take classes an get groomed there,” Morgan interjected. “We don’t really like gettin’ groomed, but we look FABULOUS when we’re done!”
Milo lowered his voice and leaned toward me. “Wanna know somethin’ funny? When Mom an Dad are talkin’ about goin’ out or goin’ for a walk an they don’t want us to get excited, they spell W-A-L-K or O-U-T or G-O.”
“I’ve heard a lotta humans do that,” I commented.
“I KNOW. They think we can’t spell. Isn’t that hi-LARRY-us? So we go along with it. We pretend we don’t know what W-A-L-K means. We just remain calm.”
Me an Milo an Morgan laughed behind our paws. “I think a lotta us do that,” I said. “Things go much smoother when humans think they’re in charge.”
They nodded.
“Since you’re Spaniels, I assume you swim?”
“Oh, Milo, you gotta tell Mr. Bonzo about your swimming pool adventure,” Morgan said.
“It’s kinda embarrassing, but here goes: my first full day here, I was lookin’ at everything, checkin’ stuff out, real excited. So I see this kinda shiny big thing, an it looked like it’d be a nice place for runnin’ around. So I jumped. Well, first thing I know, I’m all wet and coughin.’ It was like this big water bowl. So I starting franickly movin’ my legs. Mom said, ‘’Oh, look, Milo’s not doing a Dog Paddle, he’s doing an Australian Crawl. He instinctively knows what to do in the water cuz he’s a Spaniel.’ But Dad said, ‘NO WAY, he jumped in cuz he thought it was a solid surface. He didn’t have a CLUE.’ Dad was right. I was Totally Freaked Out and was just tryin’ to get my soggy caboose outta there. Never went near that pool, or any pool, ever again. I don’t care if I AM a Spaniel.”
“Do you have those big, long kennel names nobody ever uses?”
“Yes, we do,” said Morgan. “Milo’s is Durramore Bailey’s Surprise an mine’s Morgan Louise of Cossa Creek. I ackshully came with an in-STRUCK-shun book!
“Woof! Fancy! Any pooch pals?”
“My Bestie’s Frankie,” Milo said. “He’s a chihuahua mix. We were puppies together.
“An one time, up in Asheville, North Caro-LINE-uh, we met this real frenly duck. She was wearin’ a shirt an sneakers, just like her human Dad. Didn’t catch her name. We don’t speak much Duck.”
Heading home, I was thinking about all the cool poocheroos I’ve met who are frenly with other species. Like cats. Or Milo an Morgan and the Duck. Or that puffin who decided to have fish for playmates instead of lunch. I think we’re on to something.
Till next time,
The Bonz
